Baddog Not A Redneck?!?

I wasn't gonna blog about this but I can hold it in no longer. Two nights ago, during a broadcast of The Doghouse With Baddog, it was revealed that he (Baddog, himself) had never seen, much less sat through an entire NASCAR race. What??? Really??? A founding member of the Redneck Radio Network has never even sat through much less been to a Nascar race? Well, Friends, what are we to do? We can't have somebody runnin' around claimin' Redneck Status that ain't rightfully theirs? Don't get me wrong. I have much love for my "Non-Redneck", Carpet-bagger brethren. And We ( The other RRN founders and listeners) don't aim to bring shame and degredation to my brother, Baddog. On the contrary, we. want to help the man. If that had come out at the wrong moment (i.e. like AT a NASCAR event); "Hey this is my first time at a real race! Neato!!", he would be promptly taken out back where he would be skinned, gutted and mounted and not necessarily in that order; Just for merely perpetrating the act of "Impersonating a Redneck". That there is frowned upon, greatly in the community. You can't just go claimin', "Hey look at me, I'm a redneck! Hyuk hyuk!!" It ain't even that kind of party. You can believe me when I say that there ain't too many, what you might call, "requirements" to bein' a redneck but watchin' a race at least ONCE is definitely a requirement by anyone's standards. Personally, I'd hate to see a man demoted to "Carpet-bagger" status for this one infraction. However, the sheer weight of this one infraction is such that it requires immediate attention.

So what're we gonna do about this? Well, first of all, we've assigned homework. For starters, he's got to watch genuine NASCAR racin' movies, like say, Six Pack with Kenny Rogers, or Stroker Ace with Burt Reynolds. And no, Days of Thunder is RIGHT OUT!!! No self-respectin' redneck that I know, would ever agree that Tom Cruise ever did a decent "Racin' Movie". Nope...His mouth is wayyyy too purty. Also, The Daytona 500 is comin' up in February. One way or the other Baddog is going to be required to sit through the entire broadcast, be it on television or MRN. Otherwise, we will have no choice but to report this violation to the proper athorities, as soon as we figure out who they are.

Be sure to tune into The Doghouse With Baddog to follow up on this sortid tale. We're on Monday through Friday 7 PM Eastern / 4 PM Pacific on Ustream.tv. Be sure to go here and bookmark the show.

Fear not. We're here for ya, Baddog!